A Goofy Foot in Mouth

I just finished reading Fearless: The Undaunted Courage and Ultimate Sacrifice of Navy SEAL Team SIX Operator Adam Brown.  If you ever want to be inspired by someone who pushed the limits, read this book.

Adam Brown was a kid from Arkansas who played football in high school but was a little lost after graduation.  He started a relationship with the wrong girl and she turned him on to drugs.  He eventually became a crack addict.  His parents applied the toughest of love, and called the police to have him arrested for a felony.  After jail, he found God, the woman of his dreams and a friend’s father to vouch for him so he could enlist in the Navy.  He then became a SEAL.  During training a sim round grazed his eye, rendering it blind.  Adam taught himself to shoot off-hand, completing the NSW sniper school left-handed.  A Humvee accident shattered his shooting hand and so he trained himself to complete CQB also with his left hand.  He was selected for Green Team and with only one eye and his non-dominant hand, completed the course and joined DevGru.

If that doesn’t inspire you, I don’t know what will.  Instead of care packages, Adam asked his wife to send him shoes and socks which he handed out to Afghan children; over 500 pairs with the help of their church community.  Some of the other stories from Adam’s life are just as incredible.  It was uplifting just to read them.

The reason we know all of this is that he specifically asked that his story, including the bad parts, be told so that people know that you can turn your life around with the help of God.  Some of this was detailed in his CACO order.  I never even knew this existed, but soldiers  actually write down how to plan for their deaths, should the worst happen.  A Casualty Assistance Calls Officer is named, the person who delivers the news to your family.  Every soldier I have known or spoken with, always refers to their duty as “doing their job” or “going to work”.  Imagine what it is like going to battle and thinking of it as just another day at the office.  I still haven’t even written my will.

Adam wrote several letters to his family in a journal his wife asked him to take to Iraq/Afghanistan.  Two entries got me to thinking about some things.  The first was after the Abu Ghraib prison incident when Adam worked as an interogator in another facility.

I want you to know, as you read history and opinions in school about 2004, that going to this war was right…We are harder than anyone at these detention centers and let me tell you, we treat these guys with the utmost professionalism…I fight for people’s freedoms, not to take [them] away…As a Christian, one assumes great compassion…This is the American soldier…If your mom and I ever teach you anything, I pray it is at least to show all people courtesy and respect.  The truly courageous and powerful never have to prove it.  It is always shown in their actions.

While serving in Afghanistan…

From everything I’ve read, seeing these kids, including girls, playing, tells me we are doing right here.  I have not gotten a single sour face from any of the locals, and I don’t see fear in their eyes.  I’m sure I will learn more over time…but we have restored their dignity, and their lives …the Taliban had taken that away.  Kids, I am proud to be here doing what we are doing.

Today at work I spent the day trying to explain how to operate a computer system I designed to a group of users and operators.  I then spent a few hours trying to figure out how to make a certain financial model roughly 1% more accurate.  We actually have HR people that work to find ways that our jobs can be more rewarding.  When I think about what Adam did, and what I do, I can’t help but recognize the simple truth that there really isn’t much that can be done to make me proud of my job.  And yet they try.  And they spend a good chunk of money on it.

But what amazes me is this reality: We are all shareholders in the corporation America.gov  We continue to vote for an executive team hell bent on bankrupting our investment.  But no matter how awful they are at their jobs, they somehow manage to hire, train and employ the single greatest team at the subsidiary Defense.mil  These professionals perform at an extraordinary capacity, despite working for a group of incompetent blowhards.  The worst part in all of this, is that half of the shareholders directly disapprove of the work their company does so well.  Imagine going to work everyday and being told that what you do is not worth your time, effort, passion and commitment.  How much would that suck.

The US Military defends freedom and protects Americans.  They do that so well that we have been able to expand our scope and branch out into other markets.  We are the number one in our market, with a commanding market share.  When you are that successful, shareholders should recognize the value of their investment.  If they can’t, then sell.  Go find another investment.  The men and women of the armed forces deserve to realize the satisfaction of a job well done without being told by their supervisors that their work is unimportant.  What Adam taught me, is that service to your country is not a ‘duty’.  It may be your calling, it may be what you are passionate about, it might even feel good to do that work every day, to see the value of your contribution.  If you feel that passion, no one, no matter what their job, deserves to have that spirit squashed.  This shareholder says thank you for contributions, keep doing what you do.

A few days ago I saw a story on Ignites (Financial Times) that Snoop Dog had been recruited by a group that is trying to convince people to “unload” gun company related investments from their retirement accounts. I am actually a Snoop fan and like his music. I think he is a pretty talented rapper and has some good lyrics and even cited him as an example of rap with “character”. I can do this even though I fundamentally disagree with his excessive use of the N-word because his music makes him a good musician, but not a good role model.  You don’t praise someone for advocating violence and disrespect.

But my reason for writing this post has nothing to do with Snoop’s talent or style, it has to do with hypocrisy. You can’t use your identity to profess an idea as noble, while espousing contrary ideas as a part of your identity. ESPECIALLY when your identity is the only reason someone asked you to espouse the idea.  Check out some of Snoop’s lyrics.

One gun is all that we need, to put you to rest
Pump pump, put 2 slugs dead in your chest
Now you dead then a motherfucker, creepin and sleepin
6 feet deep in, fuckin with the Pound is
Suicide, it’s a suicide
–From “Serial Killa” 1993

Prepare for a war, it’s on, I’m head huntin
Hit the button, and light shit up like Red Dawn
Peep, the massicre from a verbal assassin
Murderin with rhymes packin Tec-9’s for some action
–From “Doggy Dogg world”  1993

Me and my cousin Corleone we run downtown
Murder’s an everyday thang in the city
Where you gotta plot chips, jag robberies and do in its
Tanadian Nay, the charge of the weapons
Hit from verandahs and do a thing unexpected
So we plan a plot with an Uzi and 10 shot
Buck em till they all drop,circle round the block
Let em have it as soon as they come out
Unload on their ass, commence to takin them out!
–From “Downtown Assassins”  1996

What you aint heard why I ride for these niggas, I die for these niggas
Do a drive by with my forty five cause I’m down with these niggas
–From “Down 4 My Niggas”  1999

See me, I’m bout my money my paper I’m bout my dollars
Poppin collars with this mac and this slack and these two revolvers
–From “Wrong Idea”  2000

Later in Snoop’s career he seems to have become a little more enlightened, like he actually believes that the glorification of gangs and violence is not longer really all that admirable.  But I have never seen him condemn his music as something like youthful misguided exuberance or use any language that made you think he might have regretted it or learned a lesson that he now wants to impart on his young loyal fans.  He somewhat tried to disassociate his older music by recording under a different name “Snoop Lion” but his public persona is still Snoop Dogg. 

From his new thinking, the best line below is about how the bullet isn’t the fault, but the shooter.  And that even while he advocates against guns, it’s people -no not the gun on its own- but people that “didn’t listen”.

I know that somebody died, somebody’s child
Some people ducked down and some people hide
Some people just cannot react in time
Bullets do not choose a victim
It is the shooter that picks them
They just cant wait to get you in the system
The district attorney could use a conviction
Told you no guns and then you didn’t listen
–From “No Guns Allowed”  2013

Isn’t it great that this comes from the guy who was acquitted of murder in 1996 not because he wasn’t in the car with his bodyguard who killed someone, but because they followed the victim to a takeout restaurant, picked a verbal fight with the person and fired at the victim when he reached for his own gun.  ie Self-defense. 

But just 2 years before this newfound disapproving opinion of gun use, look at how he explicitly looks back on his youth.  Is this really the guy you want as a role model who released this gem of nostalgia?

The hood raised me, gang-banging made me a bully, ya dig
Burnt out and any party we at, you know it’s turned out
The people talking the rumours
Now what you heard about?
How I spend 100 thou gettin’ purped out
I’m strapped up, I keep a pistol for these suckers tryna act up
They know I’m famous like I won’t get in the streets cuz
–From “Raised in Da Hood”  2011

So those of us that want to own guns for self-defense and want a healthy industrial complex to enable our right for self-defense are wrong, but Snoop can be ‘strapped’ because he is scared of his rabid fans? Does that sound right? Sounds like a lot of hypocrisy to me.  Maybe over the last few years Snoop has given up his gangsta ways and really believes he should just smoke pot to replace the violence of his past.  But without moving away from the violence-glorifying public persona that built him up, I still can’t buy into the idea of Snoop as any sort of advocate for anti-violence and certainly not an effective spokesperson for an attitude that is suddenly anti-gun.  What you say and do stays with you; if you build a persona around a fake or ‘stage’ name, then all of that baggage comes with you.  Stick to rapping.  #UnloadSnoop

This Hillary email thing cracks me up.  “When I got to work as Secretary of State…”  Yeah ALLLL those years ago.  It sounds like the dark ages of green screens; it was 2009.  “I opted for convenience…” good thing she took her role so seriously cuz she is what, only 4th in line of constitutional succession, yeah nothing really sensitive or anything like that.  Was her account ihatemonica@gmail.com ?  Come on really?  What pisses me off more is the sheer incompetence of the reporting of this issue.  No one can call a computer geek to help ask some simple questions about the “email system” ?

I work in a financial services company and our security “when I got to work there in 2003” was a hell of a lot tighter than the State Department. Good thing those guys aren’t sending communications about state secrets.  What director of IT lets a lawyer from Arkansas run their own email server for official business?  If she did send ‘internal’ emails from this machine, how did they ensure security?  We run trainings every 5 minutes about security and using personal resources for business. I have to ‘attest’ to policies each year.  You’re telling me that the Secretary unilaterally disavowed this kind of stuff?  Why is this State Department computer geek not on TV with his/her right hand in the air?

And why is it coming to light now? If you get an email from nocigarsforme@clinton.com or whatever she used, would you answer it? And if her extension is @state.gov then a government employee was supporting this machine?  She said it was in their home, guarded by Secret Service.  An Exchange server needs lots of support, who was doing it?  Who was the IT tech?  What is his security clearance?  What was the backup policy? Who did the endless Microsoft patch upgrades?  Was the hardware upgraded?  If so, where is that old machine? What was the disposal policy?  What was the encryption algorithm?

If Bill or Hillary maintained the machine themselves..big props. That requires some technical skill.  But is there really no congressman computer geek anywhere on an oversight committee that will ask these questions?   The Secretary of State communicates with Congress all the time, no one noticed the sent-from address???  She said that all of her official emails printed out to 55,000 pages.  So she printed it.  On paper.  What Democrat is ok with that much paper being wasted and I am sure photocopied?

Let’s do some simple math.  If you are SecState for a few days over 4 years, that is roughly 800 official working days.  I will exclude weekends, but we know she is emailing constantly, because there are a thousand pictures of her staring at the Blackberry.   I will be overly generous and say, half of those are original emails from her at 1 page each, so that is 27,500 emails.  This is way overstated, because the role of Secretary is all about gathering information and processing it before sending communications.  But I digress.  Of the rest, they must be incoming single emails or part of a thread.  Now if you have ever printed an email thread, you know that each time you see the email, it retains the prior string.  My 12 year old daughter knows that.  Also, that means that your inbox was hit multiple times for the same email.  So let’s discount the rest of those emails by a factor of 2.5 average printed pages per email.  That makes another 11,000 emails for 38,500 in total at my very conservative assumptions.  That translates to 48 emails per official work day. Really? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???  The Secretary of State of the most powerful nation in the world only receives 48 emails a day?  I do 50 before 10 am and I only communicate with a few countries.  Imagine having contacts in every single country on the planet, how many emails do you think you would you get?

What moron only has 1 email account?  So Hillary never set up anything on Yahoo or Gmail?  Did she use her Senate created account for the 8 years there?  She said the server was set up for the Clinton Global Initiative.  That started in 2005.  She was Senator from 2001-2009.  If you do personal stuff on your work account, you better know that it will be read. If you do business stuff on your personal account, you better know you are going to get fired.  And if you don’t know that, then you are certainly not in touch with the American people or reality.

I guess what might scare me even more than Hillary’s arrogance is an interview with Lindsay Graham this past weekend on Meet the Press.  A probable presidential candidate actually proudly admitted that he had NEVER sent a single email.  He then snarked that he would gladly turn over all of them. In an age of technology where we need leadership to make sure we maintain a dominant position in tech for the coming decades, do we really want to elect someone who hasn’t done the single most basic facet of internet use possible?  What a joke, I think South Carolina should “Exchange” him.

I should probably do a little 2014 wrap up before listing out goals for the new year.  It was probably the worst year ever, culminating in a life changing event that left me fundamentally shell-shocked.  I will write about it at some point, but not now.

The year started off promising.  I got my MVP/Promo video created and was really feeling good about a lot of things in life and with where I was going.  I took a new role at work, had a nice trip to Ireland and shortly thereafter, things started heading downhill.  In July we took an amazing vacation to Belize and things were looking like they might actually turn a corner and get better.  I was checking email in Belize and could tell that as soon as I got home, everything would start to suck, and sure enough it did.  I am positive that work led to most of my misery, as the stress destroyed everything in me, that is me.  I started working 80 hour weeks, traveling to BOS and generally feeling dreadful about everything.  Even with a ton of support all around me, the year, my outlook on life, and my sanity spiraled downward culminating in the tumultuous Q4.

So with that I am using the new year as an arbitrary fresh start.  I think I missed last year but I am going to start to list out my goals each year.  Here we go….

• Fix stuff and finish projects
• Blog 50x
• Surf 5x
• Hike at least half of the 4Ks in NH
• Hike Long’s peak
• Get involved in TAG
• Ski 20x
• Join a hat league
• Finish tailgate box
• Build a camping rig for my truck
• 8 miles in 1hr
• <20 min 5k
• Meet the SeAL standards
• 165 lbs
• Murph in 60 mins
• Pitch idea at work.  New role
• Small model working prototype TMZ
• Acadia trip with girls
• Hug the girls more
• Find peace

Yes that is an ambitious list.  But I am tired of not getting things done.  So I will set my goals high and see what the tide brings in.

Growing up my dad had this philosophy that 90% of fixing broken stuff, can be done by taking it apart, cleaning it up and putting it back together.  Magically it would work again.  This has held for pretty much my entire life, and I would bet that the percentage is accurate.  When I opened the pool a few months ago, the filter was not priming itself, so I took it apart.  Given that the motor is 11 years old, I figured that I would take it to the shop to see what a new one would cost.  Better to replace it at the beginning of the season while I had it apart (took about an hour to get it removed).

Free plug and recommendation to The Swimming Pool Center in Hampstead for what happened next.  I showed the guys the pump and asked about replacement.  $350…wow.  But I wondered if I just replaced the seals, is that worth it, given the age of the motor?  According to these guys, unless the motor is whining (bearings) they last forever.  So $8 later and another hour of cleaning the gaskets tracks, inserting new seals and lining with special grease; the motor is back in and roars to life with more pressure than I have seen in years, and it is self-priming again too.

As a kid, I took everything apart.  Owning a landscaping business, I pretty much had to clean the tractor all the time.  Who didn’t take apart their Atari 2600 almost daily to try to get the games to stop freezing?  Cleaning the chain on your bicycle, oiling the derailer.  Cleaning the plugs and then the throttle plate of a carburator.  Everyone changed their own oil and brakes.  That’s what you did.

No one does that stuff anymore and kids can’t even fathom the analytical skills necessary to start a project.  An iPhone is intentionally made not to be taken apart.  Electronic fuel-injection?  No way is Gumout going to help there.  The sad part is that tools are so much better now.  There is a YouTube video to fix ANYTHING.  When I used to take apart cars, I would take Polaroids and use a sharpie to number the pictures so I could remember the steps to put it back.  A roll of 10 pictures cost like $20 and the quality was shit.  That pic above was from my phone and I can zoom to see more than I can in real life (without glasses).

Can we quantify in the macro sense what is happening to the world now that no one ever tries to fix anything?  Why bother, when replacing the item with something Made in China is probably cheaper than your time spent fixing it?  I know I have become the old fogey I used to rail against as a kid, but I think the principle is bigger than people comprehend.  Kids have no ability to break down physical tasks step-by-step and devise better systems for accomplishing a goal.  My personal triumph is when I had the epiphany to tape screws to the cement floor and number the masking tape.  First out, closest to object.

Life is not an X-box game.  When you take down the enemy bunker, you just try different strategies until one works; the game determines success.  That is not analytical.  I know that within the next 25 years we will have self-driving cars.  And then my mantra that everyone should know how to drive a standard transmission becomes even more moot.  But I just can’t believe we aren’t setting ourselves back as a civilization by not learning the skills necessary to observe something broken, devise an approach and try to fix it.

This reminds me of one of my favorite quotes…

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

-Robert A. Heinlein

Try it today, just take something apart, clean it up and put it back together, the world will be a better place.

I am not sure exactly when this started, but many crossfit gyms will gather to do the Murph workout on Memorial Day, and so will I. Special thanks to Phantom Crossfit for letting me come hang out with them. There are a lot of ‘named’ workouts. Fran and Angie are probably the most famous. But on Memorial day we do Murph to honor LT. Michael P. Murphy (SeAL) who was killed in action on June 28, 2005. The movie Lone Survivor with Mark Wahlberg tells the story and is widely credited with being factually accurate.

Per his friends, Lt Murphy loved this workout, which was originally named Body Armor –

Run 1 mile
100 Pullups
200 Pushups
300 Air Squats
Run 1 mile
…wearing a 20lb vest

You can divide up components. Last year I did 10/20/30 for 10 rounds and hit 56 minutes, without the vest. This year I am going to do it right, and will wear my vest.

This is my little way of honoring those that have fallen to give me the freedom I enjoy today. Then I plan to grill, drink beer and sit by the pool, because what else honors being American on Memorial day and the life we enjoy from their sacrifice.  People make fun of grilling on Memorial Day as a cliche.  But you know what?  If we didn’t practice the act of enjoying our freedoms, there would be no sense in having freedom.  There are those that sacrifice to provide it, make their sacrifice worthwhile.  It’s no different than shaking the hand of a serviceman and saying “Thank you for your service.” 

I encourage you to participate and sign up with the larger effort here -> http://themurphchallenge.com  You can also donate to the scholarship fund, http://murphfoundation.org  The latter is really easy, at least do that one.

I remember being an FNG straight out of college and thinking I would rule the world within a year. I remember pushing hard and wanting to do more. What happened to that ethos? Every kid straight out of college today has zero ability to think for themselves. I thought it was me at first, but many I talk to lately observe the same reality: College grads are stupid.

This makes me think about the startup scene, where there is so much activity in what would seem to be the only area of growth in the economy right now. A few observations:

1) So many of these newbie grads need to go through an accelerator program to gain basic skills
2) Corp training programs are necessary for any corporate exposure
3) Grads have zero ability to write. I see “KK” vs “ok” as an example. What the f is that? Abreviating “Okay” as “OK” at least saves two keystrokes. Kids are so stupid.

These are all logistical examples of how kids can’t think. But when I think back to my own experiences and eagerness straight out of college, what I now realize is that kids lack context. Context is only created by years of experience. Experience lets you tell stories of things you actually did, not read about in a case study or some silly role playing classroom excercise. People communicate by context, by sharing war stories, by establishing common ground based on what they have done. A doctor can share experiences with an electrician (ie problem solving) and reach common ground so that they can relate. But any newbie has no frame of reference to establish any sort of reference, short of sports that is.

Everyone has ideas. Many are good, many suck. But what is important in the business setting is the ability to convey those ideas. The smartest FNG under the sun will fail if she can’t relate those ideas to customers, partners, developers, employees and managers. It just never works. Context creates the ability to connect.

Now that I am older I finally get it. I walk into seminars or meetings and meet new people all the time. Inevitably my ability to work with them is predicated on building common ground. I do this by getting to know them, know their resume/background/life and then sharing stories. I then use these “social bridges” when we need to work together. These bridges form the conduits by which team dynamics create a network whose abilities are greater than the sum of its parts. Relationships are everything. They are built on shared experiences. Without experience, how do you build?

Yes, being old and telling old timer skinny ski, green screen, impact printer, DOS 5.2, floppy drive, rotary phone, UHF/VHF, carburetor stories matters. It matters a lot.

I can’t tell you how much this expression drives me nuts. It has become a tag line for change, when someone doesn’t want change. That will end Social Security as we know it. Don’t trust him, he wants to end Medicare as we know it. Shut up already. EVERYTHING ends “as we know it”. Health insurance (not health “Care” which hasn’t changed at all) ended “as we know it” with the passage of the Affordable Care Act. Medicare, with the passage of the prescription drug benefit ended “as we know it.” A person’s life ends “as we know it” when they get married. The reason it ends “as we know it” is because any change inherently leads to something which we can’t know with a high degree of specificity.  But that doesn’t make it bad.

I have to say that as of today, I think that Libraries must end as we know them. I will bet that you will agree this is not a bad thing. I only know one librarian, and I am curious if she will agree.  KB-B?

Haley has a research paper assignment for school. One of the things I like about the way schools are handling the onslaught of easy access via the Internet, is that they often make kids utilize one book as part of their bibliography. Haley chose to do research on Leonardo Da Vinci, arguably one of the most influential artists and inventors of the Renaissance. So I honestly did not feel much of a sense of urgency in finding a book at the local library, due tomorrow. Now I don’t fault the library here, but we couldn’t find one single (non children’s) book about this very famous person. We asked for help, we ran searches, we even used the new cataloging system. [Spoiler alert – the Dewey Decimal system is slowly being replaced] I found this both preposterous and disappointing.

Like I said, I don’t think this is the library’s fault. Between fiction and non-fiction, maintaining inventory for every possible nugget of information that has ever been assembled, is impossible. Physical books are just too cumbersome, labor intensive and expensive to maintain at the smaller libraries.  After we got home a B&N search yielded some possibilities, though since I can’t actually thumb through the books, I have no idea what will really work for Haley and I will have to pay $11.99 to resolve just one option at the top of the list.

In my opinion the basic premise of the library boils down to three things:

1. Proximity to consumers
2. Perpetual availability of physical objects (books)
3. Professional curation of literature

In the Internet age, is the physical structure of a library really the best way to do this stuff?  I like being the old-fogey and make Haley run a search and then find the book on the shelves, but I have to admit, I’d like to see the notion of Library change.

Proximity – Is there anything more convenient than a device in your house with an almost endless capacity to consume data from anywhere in the solar system (if you include satellite imagery, I don’t think I am exaggerating)

Perpetual Availability – I think we have backups figured out by now, so realistically there is no need to worry about losing data anymore.  And the tree-hugger in me would like to use less paper.  Kindle and Nook have created a physical experience that is actually better than the paper-printed word.  But we need to do better with speed, search, connectivity, and compatibility- that should be the easy stuff.

Professional Curation – And here is where I think we really need to change our theoretical approach the least, but it will have the most effect.  Much of the internet is complete shit.  If you want political news, you can’t search for the subject or you end up with some crap blog that scraped a real story, filtered it to a partisan whim and then publishes it as though it were unbiased truth.  I pick a major news outlet and search its site directly.  As of today, Jason Calacanis who tried to do curated search with Mahalo before the Panda update, released Inside.com which is curated news.  They employ professionals whose job it is to find the best content for news (from ALL sources), summarize it, and provide links back to the source.  He calls it “Pandora for news.”  Libraries are content distributors for researched facts.  Librarians are the curators, and they are indispensible.  I just think they are putting their talents to bear in the wrong place.

Side note = I’d like to focus on non-fiction, because I think the very notion of fiction lends itself to better curation via the social channels (twitter, facebook, tumblr).  In addition, the form factor and distribution problems are already being solved quite well by Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

How often do you search for something and find a Wikipedia page that may or may not be trustworthy.  Those guys have gotten better in the past few years and their source linking is pretty good, but still.  If all the best research is being published in books, why shouldn’t we have a better source and better curated system of distribution for all of this great content?

Imagine a librarian, who might actually edit the Wikipedia page, expert in a subject area, whose job it is to curate all the best thinking about that subject.  You seek out the librarian to help you understand the subject in the level of detail that is pertinent to you.

I have no idea what we spend on libraries and librarians, but I can only dream about how much better my research experience could be if we were to deploy that human and infrastructure capital in a more efficient manner.  I’m sure the perfect 5th grade level Leonardo Da Vinci book is out there somewhere; it would be nice if someone could have helped me with that… and it was on Haley’s Nook right now.

I’ve read a little about executive coaches in various blogs.  I always chocked it up to advice for 20 something CEO’s fresh out of college tech programs who really don’t understand how a business works.  A few months ago we started a program at Fido that I didn’t even realize was coaching until I looked up the facilitator.  Free plug to CRA.  I have to admit, I am a convert, it was an exceptional experience.

I didn’t necessarily have 1:1 coaching, but our group of 15 or so Directors formed a pretty good bond over the 4 months.   In some ways I think I actually got better perspective by John introducing topics, concepts and best practices, and then letting the group provide color based on experience.  It was certainly beneficial to me as I always thrive on alternate perspectives.  Some I agree with and some I like to sample, if for no other reason than to excercise my thought process for disagreeing.  Some of what we learned is universal, I’ve even used some of it with the girls.  We had a great discussion last week about how Megan and I can trust them to do their jobs (school, chores, sports), treating us as a ‘boss’ that grants them more responsibility as they perform at a higher level.

But I think most of the really good stuff was about not following the tradewinds.  Leaders have a good idea of what they believe will work and then spend their time not convincing you that they are right, but helping you see that vision as the utopia it is.   Successful leaders actually build what they concepualize.

For the last session we all read an essay, that I have to say is one of the most insightful discussions of leadership that I have read.  It is a lecture that was given at West Point in October 2009.  A few things stuck with me.

• “That’s really the great mystery about bureaucracies. Why is it so often that the best people are stuck in the middle and the people who are running things—the leaders—are the mediocrities? Because excellence isn’t usually what gets you up the greasy pole. What gets you up is a talent for maneuvering”
• About David Petraeus (pre-affair) in the context of the Counterinsurgency Field Manual   “No, what makes him a thinker—and a leader—is precisely that he is able to think things through for himself. And because he can, he has the confidence, the courage, to argue for his ideas even when they aren’t popular. Even when they don’t please his superiors.”
• About a study of college students multi-tasking “…people do not multitask effectively. And here’s the really surprising finding: the more people multitask, the worse they are, not just at other mental abilities, but at multitasking itself.”
• Which leads to “Multitasking, in short, is not only not thinking, it impairs your ability to think. Thinking means concentrating on one thing long enough to develop an idea about it. Not learning other people’s ideas, or memorizing a body of information, however much those may sometimes be useful.”
• And most importantly “I find for myself that my first thought is never my best thought. My first thought is always someone else’s; it’s always what I’ve already heard about the subject, always the conventional wisdom. It’s only by concentrating, sticking to the question, being patient, letting all the parts of my mind come into play, that I arrive at an original idea.”
• I wrote about some of this before, but I like this passage about sourcing news/ideas from Twitter or Facebook “…you are continuously bombarding yourself with a stream of other people’s thoughts. You are marinating yourself in the conventional wisdom. In other people’s reality: for others, not for yourself. “

One of the most important themes I took out of the sessions was the need for me to be me.  Every so often I slip into a mode of feeling that I need to play the Fido corporate game and figure out the best way for me to move ahead.  It forces me to want to check my creative self at the door and build a team that reaches concensus and presents an integrated approach to some idea that really doesn’t do much of anything in the world.  But when I think about what that means, about what i would actually have to do, I am disheartened.  It shouldn’t have to be like that.  I want to do great things and make a difference in the world.

I remember reading that Bill Gates used to take a few weeks every year and get some solitude with a stack of whitepapers and notebooks (he probably went to The Yellowstone Club…jealous).  To a lesser extent, I have done this up in VT, but it is something I really want to focus on in 2014.  Finding time to think, imagine, and strategize.  If I am going to be successful, it will only be by imagining the way that things should be, and then executing a plan to get there. 

The class inspired me to really start moving on my startup and focus on making that happen.  This has been years in the making, but I am finally getting around to making it real.  As we roll into 2014, you will see my posts become less political and more focused on making this thing successful.  Please stay tuned, my best, most thoughtful and forward thinking work is right around the corner.

Later today is the last Pats game for the regular season.  Each week preceeding a home game, either Sam or I send a note to all attendees detailing time, place, food, etc.  Inevitably, we have a newbie and I have to tell them about our music system.  I am tired of doing that so I will post a longer version here.  If you are attending the Slappy T-Bone Tailgate Extravaganza, be sure to read.

History

When I first built the Tailgate Box, I figured we would mostly play the radio while tailgating, it was the easiest solution and sometimes I like listening to pre-game.  Within the first few games, I remember connecting my iPad on shuffle and let it play.  CMAC was there one week and of course he had complaints.  So he played some songs, and others joined in as well.  The following week we debated a new system wherein everyone would get to play a few songs.  We settled on 5.  That week I decided that we would DJ in order of seniority, so I went first.  This too was not well received (there were tears- as Sam likes to say).  And so through several iterations we have arrived at the current system, which is not without its rules.

The 4-Song-Set

The whole point is to let everyone play music and build a camaraderie with the crew and to a lesser extent, our neighbors.  We play music LOUD.  It is hard to have a conversation, and if you have some small radio, it will not be heard.  Too bad.  Use text because phone calls do not go well.  4 songs is just enough to build a rhythm.  Or put together a theme.  A lot can be said with 4 songs, but it’s not too long that you get overwhelmed.  It forces the player to put some thought into the list and create an order that really works.  It allows flexibility but yet forces you to make tough choices.  It really is beautiful, I am quite proud that Chris, Sam and I have really evolved it to where it is.

The Rules

1. Four songs means 4 individual tracks.  The Eddy-G rule was created aptly for Ed who insists that “intro” tracks don’t count.  Tough luck, they do.
2. Each track cannot be longer than 5 minutes.  This is the Spence-Rule, so we don’t listen to 45 minutes of Pink Floyd.
3. You must have the playlist assembled and ready to go on a device that can play through a headphones audio jack (3.5 mm stereo).  No Spotify, YouTube or Pandora.  Have the music local.
4. When we arrive at the parking lot, numbers are chosen at random to designate the order of play.  If we run out of time, tough.  If you are in a port-o-john or playing Cornhole and miss your spot, tough.  Pay attention, Eddy is always there to jump in if you are pre-occupied (endless supply of Cheap Trick not withstanding).
5. This is a tailgate for football, music should be appropriate to that scene.  No dance music, crappy pop, or country music.  Rock and roll is where it’s at.  If it is played on Jamn or Kiss… NO!
6. If you play it, you better be ready for the criticism.  If too many people object, you will get the gong (btw guys, we should totally get a real gong for shit music).  The only exception to this rule is for myself, since it’s my setup (too bad a-holes).  Sam also has carte blanche, remember that he might poke you in the sternum, and Jim Croce is cool.
7. Hard rock, classic rock, southern rock, alternative, metal, punk, funk, 80’s hair bands, and modern rock are all accepted.  e.g. AC/DC, Guns & Roses, Allman Bros, Van Halen, Iron Maiden, Rage, NIN, Michael Jackson and Stevie Wonder (both musical geniuses), James Brown, The Ramones, Led Zeppelin, Motley Crue, Def Leppard.
8. Rap is ok if it is classic and has character.  e.g. Skee-low, Run DMC, Eminem, Beastie Boys, Public Enemy, Slick Rick, Eric B & Rakim, Snoop
9. No Chicago (sorry Loren), INXS, Hall and Oats, Alanis Morrissette or anything that makes you fall asleep.
10. There is an exception to rule 9 for covers.  If a cool band covers a bad song but kicks ass, play it.  Cmac and Jiffy are masters here, see The Dan Band.
11. Themes are strongly encouraged.  All covers, all angry music, all one band, all funk, etc.  These have been well received
12. Obscure songs that remind you of childhood are awesome.  If a song comes on and someone points at you with a head-nod, you did well.
13. Order is important.  Make sure you build to a cresendo.
14. Try to limit the number of swear words used in a song.  Zero is best.  We aim to be family friendly, even while being obnoxiously loud.

I am sure that I will add some more rules as people remind me of things we have experienced in the past.

The 4-Song-Set is meant to express a feeling, it defines who you are.  If CMAC plays No Speak Americano just to make Sam crazy…yeah you get it.  As the token old guy, I like to lead off with an oldie.  Little Red Riding Hood, Poison Ivy did not go over well.  But then that says something about me too: Screw you, I play stuff that you should know.  And it says something about me that I do what I want, don’t care what people think, like the classics, and will think out of the box (Punk Rock Girl, Ray Charles’ Mess Around, The Blues Brothers, SRV – Pipeline) .  I am going to add a page and list out all of my sets here.  It will take a while to type them all out from my phone.  I hope people will comment on this post and either post their favorites or dream up a great set.

For today I am going with an all female singers theme,

• Joan Jett covers the classic Hanky Panky (my “oldie”)
• Heart – Crazy on You (awesome lead off guitar solo)
• Luscious Jackson – Naked Eye
• Straight Line Stitch – What You Do to Me