Tomorrow is my birthday. And before you say “Happy Birthday” or post on FB or some other silliness, instead I would ask you to take 5 minutes, read one of my blog posts, and give me critical feedback on it…in the comments section. That would make me much happier. I honestly could care less about you reminding me of something I already know. Might as well just post “The sun is up!” tomorrow morning. Yeah I am a little punchy today, and I know I am an asshole, no need to remind me of that too.
As I drove in this morning I was listening to MTP and the nightmare that is the current GOP nominee. I felt sad for the country. I felt depressed that I contribute nothing to making it better. I felt incomplete that another year has passed without any major goals accomplished. As I grabbed my bags out of the back seat, I realized that I had not recited Invictus today, which is my new daily ritual. Depending on how I feel, I emphasize different lines. “…my unconquerable soul…the menace of the years…it matters not how strait the gate…” and I always finish with an emphatic “I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.” I started feeling a little better.
I have tried to explain SealFit and Unbeatable Mind to people and why I have become such a fan. I think my whole life I’ve been looking for a holistic mind:body training regimen that actually has practical applications and strategies. In the book, Coach Divine talks a lot about negative emotions and strategies to interdict. Some of it involves pre-work that I haven’t gotten to yet. But this morning I made some progress.
Coach’s process goes like this
- Identify that you are having a negative emotional experience
- Based on your self exploration of these negative emotional states you should know the true underlying cause (aka the pre-work), and are thus able to quickly recognize the opposite emotional state to combat that negative one
- Re-orient yourself to the corollary positive emotional state
- Reinforce the positive state with self talk and mantras that solidify how you want to live
So for me, depression and sadness at my lot in life is really caused by a sense of disappointment in myself and what I have accomplished (lack thereof) exacerbated by the annual reminder of my birthday. “I don’t believe in the no-win scenario”** and so I refuse to accept where I am, or to look at the bright side of what I have accomplished. The glass may be half full, but just looking at it that way, doesn’t negate the fact that it IS half empty. You are deluding yourself if you think you can look past the stark reality of the emptiness of the glass.
So the opposite of disappointment for me, is determination. Determination in accomplishing my goals, kicking ass until I get there and never quitting. The whole purpose of 20X was a realization that the human spirit can take 20 times more pain and punishment than you think before it truly breaks. What seem like breaking points are just temporary and fictional surrenders to minor challenges that are easily overcome with grit.
I remind myself over and over:
- Know that you will reach your goals: Focus, Drive, Determination
- I AM the master of my fate.
- The only easy day was yesterday.
- Don’t ever ring the bell.
These thoughts awaken my kokoro spirit and get me focused on doing what is important. Hooyah 44, bring it on.
**If you don’t know this quote, well I can’t help you, watch the damn movie!