It’s my birthday.  We have a few traditions but one I almost never miss is to get in a workout.  I had a really good run today.  I put together a pretty cool playlist and went out strong.  I should start every run with John Butler Trio’s Funky Tonight because I was flying.  I decided that I was going to really push myself.  My goal is always 8 miles in 1 hour.  I’ve only done it once, but I got close today.

Last year at 20X, we were pushed to the breaking point.  Just when it looked like one of us was about to quit, the coaches would get in your ear and quietly push you to meet the challenge of the evolution.  They’d say, “Come on, you can do this.” or “Don’t give up now.”  The incentive was, “Let Me Recover You.”  The idea is that they give you the end point, they are telling you that they want you to get to the end so they can let you recover and catch your breath.  They are saying, let me give you a break, all you need to do is push a little harder a little longer and you will be there.  It’s a subtle motivation that can help you push yourself to limits you didn’t think were possible.

When you are watching your pace on the watch, you get immediate feedback on how hard you are pushing the limit.  I am definitely out of peak shape.  Up 2 of the hills, I almost puked.  But I kept pushing, and a little voice from my subconscious was whispering in my ear, “Let me recover you.”  Get to the next mile, the next corner, the next house, the next plant.  Each milestone brings a catharsis that lets you keep going to the end of the run.  I coached myself, let me recover you.

You can see I spiked my heart rate to 196, I am guessing that’s when I was at the edge.  It feels good to see the success of your effort.  I know that coaching myself, let me push to the edge.  And my recovery felt all the better.

I got a lot of things sorted out in the past month or two.  It’s been satisfying to have a plan and know where things are going.  I feel as if the past few years has been one big workout and I have been pushing myself hoping for a little break.  It is finally hitting.

While in the struggle, you don’t know if a recovery will come.  Hope is not a motivator.  But comparing my life to the run today, I am starting to think that I have the ability to recover myself simply by the act of pushing even harder through the toughest parts of life.  I’m pretty good at handling strife.  I can handle the stress, and I move through it pretty well.  But I can honestly say that when it gets hard, I don’t push myself PAST the breaking point to tackle the challenge.  I’m talking about pushing so hard that you make that experience even more painful, knowing that a recovery is coming.

I’ve never handled my personal life this way before.  But I almost always do when it comes to athletics and physical challenge.  That makes no sense, especially for a guy who hates hypocrisy and inconsistency.  The next 5 months are going to be an intense push toward the big Jan 2 singularity.  Things are going to be hard.  With each new challenge, I am going to push through it harder than I ever have before.  Pushing myself past the breaking point.

Let me recover me.